I'm so grateful I've had the opportunity to spend 4 of the last 6 years at home with my babies but it's true that all good things must come to end. It's crazy to think that in the very near future I'll be returning to my career outside of the home. If you had asked me a year ago to anticipate my feelings in regards to this "end of an era", as I sometimes refer to it, I probably would have avoided the thought all together. I've never liked endings and I use that word very broadly...I even had trouble finishing a good book when I was in high school. So you can imagine how I might feel when something I'm actually experiencing comes to end. Well, when it comes to my 4th (and final) mat leave I'm surprisingly feeling pretty good about it.
When I try to analyze why that is, I 've determined a number of reasons:
- I love babies but my body can't take another pregnancy
- I never felt as though my family was complete until Irelynn was born
- I'm scared but also excited for new job opportunities
- I'm ready to leave the "baby stage" and move on to the let's start doing things together as a family stage
- And finally, I've had 4 incredible years off with my children...but in addition, I've also learned so much about myself.
I think the key to enjoying your maternity leave is not only being there for your kids (because that's obvious), but also taking care of your own needs as an individual. I think if you can accomplish this task, it in turn helps you to become a better parent, a better partner and the best version of you.
9 Things I'm grateful I did while on Maternity Leave
1. Join a mom and baby group asap - At first I was hesitant about joining one, but some of the women I met through the original program I joined have become my best friends. Six years later they are the ones I call whenever I'm feeling lost or just need a night out...and seeing our kids grow up together, there's nothing better. I wish I wasn't so opposed to arranged marriages - some of our kids would be so perfect together ha!
2. Learn to cook - I mean really cook. Some days I think I should have been a chef haha. I've learned so much about nutrition, prepping food, cooking food and serving it. Trust me, if you want your kids to eat certain things...it's all about how you display it. Of course it hasn't been an easy task, I've done a lot of research, purchased several cookbooks and experimented with a lot of meals but it's been so worth it. Seeing my family together enjoying a healthy home cooked meal is why I do it.
3. Nurture one of your many talents - if you have a talent that's been sitting on the backburner and you've been waiting for the right opportunity to ignite that passion, then do it. For me, I started to take advantage of my creative side. Over the years I have ventured into the world of photography, acrylic painting and the art of baking.
4. Travel - something I haven't done much of in the last few years (it's much harder with 4 kids), but I did have the opportunity to travel during my first two mat leaves. As a teacher, it's so nice to be able to get away when the rest of the world isn't. Although traveling with a baby isn't exactly easy, it's worth it - being able to get away from often consistent and repetitive everyday routines is a small blessing.
5. Get fit and feel healthy - however that might look for you...walking daily, a mom and baby fitness class, join a gym (with daycare), at-home fitness programs or hire a personal trainer. The important thing is, find something you enjoy and do your best to stick with it because once you begin to feel comfortable in your own body again, it changes you for the better (I'm sure we can all attest to that). When I get my workouts in (most of them are with my kids) I feel like I can accomplish anything the day throws my way.
6. Start your own small business - I know this isn't for everyone, but it doesn't mean you have to give up your career (if you had one), it's just something to consider, something to nurture that talent I spoke of earlier. I've recently started selling custom children's paintings and I couldn't be more excited about this little journey I've begun.
7. Start writing - it's been almost two and a half years since I started writing this blog and I've loved every minute of it. Choose something you're passionate about, make your first entry and see where it takes you...at the very least you'll have something to look back on.
8. Plan for the future - even if you are unsure about returning to work...maybe you want to take more time off, maybe you're ready for a new career, regardless most people will at some point return to work outside of the home and when they do, they'll need some form of daycare. Plan ahead and rest easy. I started looking into daycares for our children within the first couple months of each of my mat leaves. It's a long, tedious and often stressful process, so don't leave it until the end.
9. Find your own parenting style - learn to appreciate advice but also know that there is more comfort in doing things your own way. No one or no book will have all the answers, so just go with flow and follow your instinct ...chances are you're only going to do what you think is best - and that's all you need to do. I breastfed all 4 kids - I don't really want to stop, I co-slept with my last two (Irelynn still sleeps with me), I use pampers and their sensitive wipes, my kids are vaccinated but I was late getting them done, I've never let my babies cry to sleep, I bribe my kids with candy (especially on family photo day), I sometimes give them dessert before dinner, I still don't know how I feel about milk, I prepare mainly vegetarian meals but when we eat out it's sometimes a meat fest and my kids love it, I made all my own baby food until very recently (I found a brand I love and it saves me a lot of time), I don't encourage flossing but I'm working on it, I am very strict when it comes to TV time, but in our house watching sports doesn't count. If Toronto is playing then we support our teams, two of my kids still use a soother (and it doesn't bother me one bit - yes my dentist knows), if they ask I'll always read them another book and I lie with them every single night...until they fall asleep. Maybe this isn't the right way of doing things, but it's become my way - learning to accept that your partner will also have his or her own ways is a whole other realization haha. Just remember you both have so much to offer.
Enjoy the rest of your week!
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