Going back to work

All ready for my first day back at work!

The other day I spent my lunch break writing about my first day back at work as a supply teacher...it's funny because in Teacher's College one task we were always encouraged to do was to "reflect" on everything!  I can't say I loved doing it - nor did I see much benefit back then.  But there I was reviewing my notes and ironically reflecting on everything that happened my first day back and in the weeks prior...

I must admit, going back to work this time around was a much smoother transition than in previous years, but I guess when you've "been there, done that", things do seem easier.  However my anticipation of the big day was met with new unexpected emotions and some minor obstacles...

In the past I've always returned to work knowing it was only for the short term - I was either pregnant or planning to become pregnant.  Perhaps this explains my eagerness to return in previous years.  Returning to work meant I could qualify for mat leave once again.  This time was different though...all year I was well aware this might be my last mat leave.  Despite overwhelming feelings of uncertainty, my husband and I avoided the "conversation".  I distinctly remember the first time we discussed starting a family - we both had never been more sure about something...why then was this decision so difficult?  I guess this is the other"big decision", no one really prepares you for.  Our recent attempts at discussing a possible 4th child have either ended in - an argument, or me encouraging him to not make any life altering decisions at this point in time...basically my way of holding onto any hope of having 4 kids.  I too have pondered the question all year - should we have one more?  Here's the truth - I've been sitting on the fence as well.  It was a constant battle...between what I've always wanted in my heart and what perhaps was more practical for my own and my family's reality.  And so, when driving to work on Friday I was kind of hoping to see a giant billboard with the answer to my question written in bold print.  Ok not really (but it would have been nice).  Instead I was welcomed with a clearer vision of where I saw myself in 5 years and I had the courage to come home and speak openly with my husband regarding my concerns and hopes for our future.  Regardless of whether we decide to have another child, I feel a huge sense of relief knowing my husband and I can communicate better with respect to our growing family.

There you have it - that was my number one concern with returning to work after baby #3...everything else just required a little planning, organization and teamwork!  As always, I procrastinated, but thankfully everything was in place by the final hours.

Here are some of the things I did to ensure a smooth transition:

1.  Trial Runs - for everything!...don't assume that things will just come together when you need them to.

•  I made very detailed arrangements with my son's school for bussing and this had to happen weeks in advance.  Once he received his pass we sent him on the bus for his first time and I was there to pick him up (as well as Tina who would be taking care of him after school).  It was a success!  It certainly made me feel better knowing he was comfortable with his new routine.
• We also did a trial run with Georgia and baby Jack.  They spent the entire morning at daycare while I ran some errands in town.  Georgia was very familiar with our daycare provider Tina, but this was Jack's first time.  I was a little worried considering I haven't been able to leave him much this year - and I'm still breastfeeding.  But we had another successful morning!  We chose a home daycare due to the fact that often they are more flexible with my schedule (as an occasional teacher I sometimes don't know in advance where I will be working).  Luckily we found a great home daycare near where we live and run by a friend whom I have known for years.
• Making lunches - Hudson and Georgia were well prepared in this area because I have packed them several lunches to go over the course of the year.  However this was a first for baby Jack, so I planned a day trip with a picnic lunch and packed all his favourite things! 

2.  Meal Prep - This is something I had planned to do ahead of time, but unfortunately I didn't get around to it until the weekend.  One thing I really focused on while on mat leave was preparing nutritious, homemade meals and exploring several recipes.  There were days I would spend hours in the kitchen cooking and baking.  While my spare time is a little less now - my goal is to continue providing wholesome meals which requires a little more planning and preparation at the beginning of the week.

3.  Planning Ahead for Daycare - although I've already spoken briefly about this topic, I should mention that finding daycare this time around was fairly easy and already in place.  However that is not always the case.  During my first mat leave, I learned that this is something you should look into almost immediately after baby arrives. I had a few friends starting to consider daycare even before their babies were born.  Although this seems rather early, it's important to know that some places will have a very long waiting list.  Also, once baby arrives, life gets really busy and the last thing you want to do is worry about returning to work.  Leaving a big decision such as this one until it's too late, can cause a lot of unwanted stress for you and your family.

4.  Me Time - once your family is taken care of, it's important to focus on yourself too.  I cut and coloured my hair for the first time all year and I can't tell you how good it felt to change my look!  It was also the first time in 5 years I changed my wardrobe a little and bought some nice casual pieces for work.  I must say...it's a refreshing change in routine  to get up and get dressed to go OUT to work - thanks mom for the new clothes!  Last but not least I planned a long needed girls night out...It was so nice to enjoy a few drinks with friends and family.

5.  Be Prepared for Some Minor Obstacles - it doesn't matter how ready you think you are or how late you stay up the night before (I think I had about 4 1/2 hours sleep) -ha!  Things go wrong and you need to be ok with that.  I thought I would share some of our mishaps from my first and second days  back!  Third time's a charm right?

• One thing I've never had to deal with when returning to work was breastfeeding.  Despite my recent efforts to introduce baby Jack to other beverages, he still prefers breast milk.  My first day back was the longest I had left him all year and he did surprisingly well.  I, on the other hand, had to bring my breast pump to school and spend part of my lunch break pumping.  I really didn't consider this an issue until I became aware that the majority of staff washrooms in schools these days don't have electrical outlets!  No big deal...I just had to pump this week and last anywhere from the Principal's office to the library book room.
• My first day back I arrived at daycare excited to see the kids and realized I only had two car seats!  I did some quick shifting around...Georgia had her seat, Jackson got to sit in Hudson's car seat and Hudson had the opportunity to sit with a seat belt, just like mommy.  He was very excited...but I warned him this was a one time experience - at least for a long time!
• My second day was even worse!  Just after 3pm I received a phone call from my son's school...I had forgotten to send in the note saying he needed to take the bus.  Fortunately I was allowed to leave work early in order to pick him up.  Thankfully when I arrived, he wasn't at all upset and I was grateful to the staff at his school for taking care of him while he waited.  That same day, we also forgot to send Georgia with her soother (and a change of underwear) which resulted in her having a minor meltdown.  I gave permission to Tina to give her Jack's soother.  Thank goodness baby Jack gave his up easily!
• My third day was a success!  Perhaps things went so well because we had my mother-in-law as well as my mom helping with the kids - Grandmas are the best!

Returning to work this time around has been a truly positive experience!  Familiar routines, catching up with students and staff, having a little independence and looking forward to the future in more ways than one!  I couldn't be happier seeing my entire family transition so well.  My husband should be commended for his ability to get all three children out of the house in the morning, on time and on their way to where they need to go!  Both Georgia and Jackson enjoy spending the day with Tina and Hudson absolutely loves taking the bus!  I have been called in to work everyday and had the opportunity to work with some great staff and students.  I used to think being a teacher would help prepare me to be a good mom...but now I know being a mom had definitely made me a better teacher!  Also, being able to go to work a few days each week has motivated me to get really organized at home.  I'm really grateful to my extended family as well for helping with the back to work transition and for their commitment to stay involved over the next couple months. 

Last but not least...it's often easy to compare yourself to other families and wonder if you're making the right decisions - regarding returning to work or staying home, working part-time vs. full time, daycare options, breastfeeding etc. - STOP!  ...because all you can do is what's best for you.

Have a great weekend!! ...and Happy Birthday to our little baby Jack who turns 1 tomorrow!  The big celebration is next weekend.